On August 25, 2013, I wrote a post about Firsts. It was five days after the Mr had his accident. We were headlong on a journey that frankly, we weren’t sure how or when it would end. I say “we” as it was “our” journey, not just his. His journey took him through pain, healing, and rehabilitation.
My journey took me through nursing him in the beginning, patience (oh lord, lots of patience), taking care of him through his rehab, and finally, letting go.
We’ve been through so much over the past 4-1/2 months. A hospital stay and six weeks of initial **bone healing that required the Mr to be confined to bed for almost the entire time. A change in brace, and the beginning of rehabilitation. We celebrated his milestones: first unaided shower, getting up and down the stairs without help, surviving his first week of rehab, transitioning from crutches to a cane, standing and walking for the first time with both feet firmly on the ground with the brace and cane, walking without the brace or cane, the first time he drove his truck, and so much more.
All of this was to get the Mr back to his normal. One of the last milestones was reached yesterday. For the first time since August, I was a passenger while he was driving.
He’s been doing a little work around the Farm (that I can’t do), on and off, for the past month or so. He’s even using the Skilsaw again. I wondered if he would be able to pick it up, let alone turn it on. It gave him pause, but he needed to use it, so he did. Personally, I believe I would still be looking at it, nevermind picking it up and using it.
During his rehab, it was all he could do to not get ill. It was painful during and after. But, he persevered. He was determined that he was going to use his leg normally. He was going to get back to his normal.
He’s had moments of great pain – both physically and emotionally, and he’s had moments of celebration (see milestones above). This has been the hardest thing he has ever done. He still has a bit of healing to do — according to his doctor, that will continue over the next few months. But all in all, he is ok.
During all of this, I took on the role of caretaker. I have a great respect for those that do it on a regular basis. It’s hard work and requires the patience of a saint. I am not a patient person (as I’ve said before), but I tried. Sometimes I succeeded, sometimes not so much. My biggest fear was that he would hurt himself, and I wanted to protect him from that. Well, that wasn’t my job, and he let me know that. A few times. The hardest thing for me was letting go of the caretaker role and transitioning back to the wife role. I have to say, in all honesty, stepping back into familiar shoes (wife role) was a relief. I got my sense of self back, and it gave him the freedom he needed to continue his recovery — his way. It was definitely a win-win situation.
All of this pain and cheerleading was in an effort to get him to where he is now, and what he will be doing tomorrow.
Tomorrow (Tuesday), he returns to work full-time, off the Farm. He has arrived at his final milestone. I am very proud of him. He is back to his normal, at last.
**According to the doctor and contrary to popular belief, a broken bone does not heal completely in six weeks. This is the time period where it is usually set and left in a cast or a brace; leaving it unsplinted can almost guarantee a re-break. It fills in enough within six weeks to enable a person to start using it on a limited basis. It generally takes eight to twelve weeks to be considered healed, but it is still weak and thin.